Caroline Quiner Ingalls was the beloved mother of five children during her lifetime, but through the writings of her daughter Laura Ingalls Wilder, she has become dearly loved as “Ma” to thousands of children through the decades.
Let’s honor Ma this Mother’s Day weekend by sharing a cherished memory of her, or of her influence on your life. Perhaps it was a lesson taught, a kindness shown, or an example modeled. Maybe a moment she made you smile, or a character trait you admire in her.
I’ll go first.
I often think of the verse that Ma penned in Laura’s autograph album in Little Town on the Prairie:
If wisdom’s ways you wisely seek,
Five things observe with care,
To whom you speak,
Of whom you speak,
And how and when and where.
And it was more than pretty words — it seems evident from the tribute her daughter paid her in her characterization that Caroline Ingalls lived these words.
Unfortunately, the reason I often reflect on this saying is because I haven’t followed its advice… but I figure if I just keep reminding myself of this ever-so-wise truth, eventually it will sink in, right?
Your turn. Please share your memory of Ma in the comments below.
“Least said, soonest mended”.
I have to learn to complete my thoughts before hitting “submit”.
A memory of Ma I especially liked is when Mary came home from college. Ma became teary-eyed when Mary told her than she could remember more Bible verses than anyone, which helped her in learning to read Braille.
Ma wasn’t one to wear her emotions on her sleeve, but her tremble-voiced, “I am glad to hear that” spoke volumes to me; of all the anguish she had to have been carrying every since Mary went blind.
This one’s a tough one, Rebecca. I, too, often reflect on Ma’s advice to Laura, written in her journal. But I also remember, in my first reading of LHIBW, Ma’s walk to the barn with Laura for company, handling the milking, realizing there was a bear in the yard, scooping up her daughter and running back to the house, pulling the latch-string in.
She demonstrated strength, presence of mind, and reassurance to her small daughter. And those are traits I really appreciate about Ma.
I always think of Ma as someone who paid attention to detail. I remember her teaching Laura “For Want of a Nail . . .” She also managed to safely transport the China Sheperdess across the prairie on many moves, which I am sure meant rough roads and rough traveling. Ma took care over the small things in life and she created a great quality of life for her family in doing so.
Wait, I don’t remember that quote…where is it? I want to read up on that one; it sounds like there’s a story there that I could learn from!
As a child what impressed me most was that she could do all that washing without getting a single drop of water on her dress. As an adult and now realizing just how hard ‘washing’ was back then, and just how encumbered poor Ma was with all those long skirts, I know better. But I still love the scene because Laura showed us how SHE viewed her mother….perfect!
Ma could do ANYthing. She was an expert cook, seamstress (despite hating sewing), hat maker, cheese maker, candle/light source maker, etc. etc.
She put up with Pa leaving a perfectly good house AND family behind, and dragging her off to Indian territory with two tiny girls while almost drowning on the way, and giving birth with little help, and being terrified of Indians AND being alone with these tiny, helpless children while Pa went off alone for hours hunting. She had amazing strength and courage and patience.
It comes as a CRUSHING blow in Silver Lake when the house is dirty and Ma looks to Laura for help in figuring out what to serve for the company coming up the walk. Laura had grown older by then and was therefore showing Ma to be more human and imperfect. But that totally rocked my Little House world….
Ma was still wonderful, but I still like to view her thru Laura’s young eyes, not her grown up eyes.
Ma is my model of patience and perseverence. And one of my favorite descriptions of her is Laura’s comment that the shawl in the Christmas basket was so like Ma – well wearing. Caroline Ingalls had no easy life, but she faced it all with uncommon courage and dignity.
The first thing about Ma that I think of is also the verse that she wrote in Laura’s album.
Besides that, though, the memory that stays with me about Ma is that she made sure that her girls remained civilized, lady-like and continued with their studies no matter what there living conditions were. Even if there was not a soul for miles around.
I love everything I’ve read so far. I’ll add something that hasn’t been mentioned, a small detail that, like so many others mentioned, spoke volumes. Laura describes how Caroline would discipline her with that one word: “Laura.” It is a perpetual goal to be that calmly effective with my own children.
Amy, to add to your story, I can’t help but think of Ma’s reaction: “To think, I’ve slapped a bear!”
Oh, the cooking. Always the cooking. Especially green apple pumpkin pie, blackbird pie, white sugar hearts … “You can’t beat the Scotch!”
For the life of me I can’t remember which book this is in, but I always think of how unflinchingly Ma faced whatever difficulty life tossed her way. I remember in one of the later books Ma telling Laura something along the line of, “Life is hard, but once you make up your mind to accept it and get on with it, it’s not so bad.” (Oh, I’m butchering her thought terribly! Wish I could find the exact quote & book!)
I also love how when Laura begins sewing for Mrs. White in LTOTP, she recalls Ma’s saying: “It takes all kinds of people to make a world.”
I love more than anything when Ma actually appologizes to Laura, in On The Banks of Plumb Creek, for having made Laura give up Laura’s rag doll, Charlotte, to their neighbor’s daughter, Anna, by saying, “I’m sorry, Laura, I’d not have made you give up your doll, if I’d realized you cared so much.”
And, then, in a few chapters later, when Laura found her doll in the Nelson’s yard, in a total mess, & “rescues” her beloved Charlotte, knowing fairly certainly that Ma probably isn’t going to be very pleased…yet instead, Ma & Laura—& probably, Mary, too, “They talked it over & decided that it (WAS) all right for Laura to have rescued Charlotte…” & then BOTH Ma & Mary helped to restore Charlotte.
This incident speaks VOLUMNS that BOTH Ma & Mary show Laura that they really do love Laura—& have respect for Laura’s feelings.
Ma always raised her girls to be mindful of ,but not vain, about their appearance.
She was always telling Laura to wear her sunbonnet. In The Long Winter when an unexpected trip to town was presenter to her, Ma did not allow Laura to borrow Mary’s freshly ironed sunbonnet. “She said Laura must wear her own sunbonnet. ‘It would be fresher,’ Ma said, ‘if you took care to keep so.’ Laura’s bonnet was limp from hanging down her back and the strings were limp too. But that was Laura’s own fault.” This simple lesson taught Laura to be responsible and plan ahead, and Ma do so with firm, fair grace. She was also validating Mary’s preparedness.
Finally, as much as she helped her girl become proper ladies with positive self images, she guarded them against the follow of vanity. As we see in On the Banks of Plum Creek when Ma makes vanity cakes for a party. She explains that the cakes are all “puffed up” like a vain person, but that inside the empty and filled only with hot air. What a wonderful lesson to her young girls and how well needed in the world today.
I aspire to me like Ma when I am a mother.
One of Ma’s sayings “Least said soonest mended” to me is a beauty as I always have foot and mouth disease and say too much!
She would have always had so much work to do – yet she never appeared incross, moody or resentful. She always had a word in season, never criticized her husband (only warned him about gambling or maybe said a song wasn’t appropriate) she was always ready to laugh, and she didn’t mind sharing her rocker with the littlest one at night.
She just seemed to be wise enough to know that above all else its people who matter, not things, and she knew that her highest goal was her family and wasn’t sidetracked by any selfishness on her part. I just wish I knew how she learned these qualities and what her own mother was like.
Even though I didn’t mind TFFY book – I realised then that all the accounts of Charles and Caroline were what really fascinated me in all the previous 8 books – yet they hardly got a mention in TFFY and I realised then that they are just beautiful parents. What a legacy to think that whilst they fought for survival in the time if TLW little did they know 100years later a show would capture the world based on Laura’s writings of them and their characters!